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| Monday, January 28, 2008 12:16 PM |
| On the Viewer - Yongary |
 by Fëanor |
You may remember me mentioning in my Christmas gift list round-up that I received the movie Yongary from poppy because it was on a double feature DVD with the movie she was really trying to get me, Konga. I put the movie on the other night and fell asleep about 30 minutes in, then poppy and I watched the rest of it a night or so later. The easiest and most accurate way to describe it is as a cheap-ass, Korean version of Godzilla. It opens just after the marriage ceremony of a young man and woman, and takes some time introducing us to these two and their family. The groom is sort of a secret agent who works for the government. The Dad (I can't remember if it's the bride's or the groom's, and lets face it, it really doesn't matter) is a high-placed government official, the brother (ibid.) is a brilliant scientist, and then there's a little kid hanging around for some reason (not sure who he belongs to) who likes to play with the scientist's gadgets. Oh, and the scientist's girlfriend is there, too; her main purpose seems to be to insult and embarrass the scientist.
The kid is introduced as the married couple are driving away. They talk about how they missed him at the ceremony, and then suddenly get hit by a flash of light that causes them to become itchy, jump out of the car, and start taking their clothes off. Turns out they've been shot at from the side of the road with an itch ray by the little scamp. The scientist shows up and gently scolds the little kid for using experimental technology on his relatives (!), then takes him away. But don't worry, the boy and the pointless itch ray will return later!
Soon afterwards, secret agent dude is called away from his wedding night (just as the festivities are about to commence!) to perform a reconnaissance mission that for some reason only he can do, even though it just involves him blasting off in a space rocket (!) and then landing again. Oh, and apparently in between he was supposed to have observed a bomb being dropped. Why he needed to be in orbit to watch somebody drop a bomb on the Earth I'm not sure, but whatever. I also wasn't clear on who was dropping the bomb (Korea? A foreign power?) or what kind of bomb it was. The point is, it cracks open the earth and starts an earthquake that slowly starts moving across Korea towards the capital. Dad, the chief Korean political official, tries to downplay the threat in his ridiculous, lazy British accent, but once the earthquake is a few hours away, he decides it might be time to evacuate the city and put it under martial law, especially since, as he soon learns, the source of the earthquake is actually a giant reptilian monster traveling just under the ground, whom everyone is able to instantly identify as the legendary creature known as Yongary, even when they're just looking at blurry black and white photos of the monster's back.
While everybody else is running out of the city, away from the monster, the scientist and the little boy decide they need to run into the city, toward the monster, so they can get a good look at it and maybe somehow figure out how to stop it. Somehow or other the kid ends up off by himself in a refinery watching the monster, and pretty much uncovers all of the essential information about the monster single-handedly. He passes it on to science guy, who makes up a monster-killing potion and takes the whole family up in a helicopter to drop it on Yongary. The end.
The special effects in the film are, of course, quite awful - although in a very charming way. Most of the film consists of a guy in a suit stepping on models and remote controlled tanks, and occasionally spitting fire. In some cases, they apparently couldn't even afford models and instead used flat painted backgrounds. The editing and continuity are pretty bad, too, especially as far as the little kid is concerned. One moment, he'll be hanging out with the rest of his family, and the next time you see him, he's miles away in a refinery shooting the monster with the itch ray. Is nobody keeping an eye on this kid?!
I haven't mentioned the most astounding, inexplicable, jaw-dropping moment in the film, mostly because you should really experience it for yourself in all its shocking glory. But if you are dying to know what I'm talking about I shall explain here, inside spoiler tags:
[spoiler]After the monster is shot with missiles (against the recommendation of the scientist) and presumed dead, the kid decides to go poke it with a stick - metaphorically, of course. He actually gets up pretty close to the monster and then starts shooting it in the face with the itch ray. Great idea, kid! Anyway, the monster eventually wakes up, gets to his feet... and starts dancing. Seriously. He dances. The kid starts laughing and dances along. The sequence lasts about a minute. A minute of pure confusion, hilarity, and horror. Then the soldiers drag the kid away and it turns back into a regular monster movie again. WTF?![/spoiler]
The movie actually has a few deliberately, legitimately funny moments in the beginning and ending sequences where the family members are bickering and messing with each other. The rest of the humor in the film is unintentional. But just because a movie is unintentionally entertaining, that doesn't make it any less entertaining. Yongary is a cheap-ass, B-monster movie, but it's a fun cheap-ass, B-monster movie, and that's all I really wanted out of it. Hoorah! |
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